Friday, October 14, 2005

No particular title today

I lost my energy that I had from the last post. It's the middle of October and I have no idea where the last two weeks of my life went! I have a shitload of schoolwork to do, work-work to do, and I think I'm going out of my mind.

I talked to a guy that I "met" online this week on the phone. We talked for quite sometime. I felt pretty comfortable talking to him without any of those ackward silences that you sometimes get when you are first talking with someone. He said he would like to talk again this week and asked if he could call. I hesitated - and he took it to mean "no" - it wasn't that, it was (and I explained) that my schedule would be pretty rough the next couple of weeks with school and work. I haven't called him yet.

Here's the thing - I don't know why I am doing this. Yes, I want to get out and meet people - I've even joined a singles events group with R that's not a dating thing - just events for singles that are put together that we meet up with. I like it - it's fun - it's different - it gets me out of the house and gives me some motivation to finish my work so I can go play. So, why am I pursuing online "dating" again - I don't know. Realistically, if I can work from Georgia at my same job (which I think I can) - I'm leaving in 9 months. NINE MONTHS. I don't want to be here anymore - I'm tired, I'm cranky, I have no family here and I'm sick of Florida. If you are reading this from out of state - don't ever live here. It's snowing in Colorado and it's still freaking 90 down here!! WITH 90-100% humidity - it's absolutely ridiculous. We won't get cooler weather until almost the end of December - it's nuts.

So, what do I do here? I'm not looking for a serious relationship. I'm not even looking for a friend with benefits. And I'm really not willing to get involved with someone when I have my heart and mind set on moving out of here in a year. I probably need to tell him this and let him decide if he wants to meet or hang out or whatever. Actually - I WILL tell him this - I hate being indirect with someone - I don't think that's fair to anyone.

On a different note, I ordered my graduation announcements today and got my tassel. I'm pretty sure I already have the hood - and I have my cap/gown from my undergrad degree that I think I'm going to use - from a distance, no one will know and I just can't see spending $55.00 on a new one that I'm going to wear twice - and R will also get use of it as well since we are about the same height - her mom can hem it for her. I'm really tired too - from school. I could go to bed right now and just SLEEP (it's 6:30 PM here - that's pretty sad).

I am procrastinating right now - it's time for me to go and get some things done. I would type a list, but then anyone who reads this would think I was absolutely insane, so it's best that I don't :)


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