Chained

First - excuse any spelling or capitalization errors - it's late and I'm typing off my laptop in my bedroom. Oh, wtf - it's my blog....

There are some type of women that I despise. I normally like most people - I, in fact, get along with almost everyone I meet. As much as C has pissed me off as a roommate, I still do care about him as a friend, and I really hate this little thing he is dating.

Women like her really, totally and absolutely screw it up for the rest of us. She's got him on a chain and is leading him around by his dick. Yep - it's pathetic. She's telling him exactly what he wants to hear: "I love you. I want you." etc. C is lonely - he wants to meet someone and get married NOW. You're probably thinking - there's nothing wrong with her saying that if she means it. Yeah, okay, read on....

First, she's been with a guy for that last four years - and she has not broken it off with this other guy, but is dating C. Hmmm....if she loves you, then why can't she break it off with the other guy? Why wouldn't she WANT to be with C all the time and not have to break dates with him to be with her "boyfriend" - oh, wait IT'S B/C SHE DOESN'T MEAN WHAT SHE IS SAYING. She's playing both sides. She's getting the attention from C that she is sorely lacking with her boyfriend, but is not willing to break it off with the other guy. Yeah, she's screwing both of them (literally and figuratively) and milking the damsel in distress thing to absolutely no end. She's 22 years old - she's playing C - big time.

My friend R came over tonight and we were doing schoolwork and we decided to go out for a change and catch a movie. C was making no move to leave the house (even though he doesn't have his kids this weekend). I figured I wouldn't even see him since he doesn't have the kids - but it's 9 PM and he's here. So, we ask him if he wants to go with us - he agrees. He calls her when we are on our way into the theater and leaves a message of where he's at and what he's doing. Okay - she's not your mom. I find out later that she broke plans with him last night AND tonight - but he still calls her. She calls back before the movie starts and I don't even know what happened there. He said he would call her when he was done. She calls back immediately and he tells me she's really pissed that he's out without her. HELLO??? Guys - answer me this - are you all really so desperate to get some that you enjoy being led around by your dick? She called FIVE TIMES DURING THE MOVIE - he checked the phone every single time - and checked his messages during the movie. I don't get it. She knows you're there - you said you would call back - leave it alone. WTF??? He hauls ass out of the theater, doesn't even say good night to R and I and immediately gets on his phone to call her back, and I presume, go to her place.

Guys - why always the damsel in distress? I really don't understand this. Women like this use you, lead you around, play games with you and you enjoy this? Wow - if this is true, I am absolutely screwed. I have never, and will never do this to someone. Why? B/c I've experienced it first hand and it's not fun - I have no respect for someone who does this either. Women like this really piss me off. When I choose to be with someone, it's b/c there is mutual respect and a desire to be with that person b/c I enjoy their company. I don't play games - I'm upfront and honest about who I am and what I want. I have goals. Yes, I have problems, but I prefer to try and work them out myself and solve them. If I can't, I'll talk and ask for advice or help. I'm fairly independent and do not believe in co-dependent relationships and feeling as though my self-worth is intricately tied to another person's happiness and allowing that person to have control over me. I did that for 12 years - I finally broke that cycle with my divorce - but it took a long time and it wasn't easy, but I did it. I now know the warning signs of it - and I see this with C - he is co-dependent really. He believes his entire self-worth is tied to someone else and not himself. In pursuit of this thing (I'll steal the Hot Librarian's term: psychohosebeast - or PHB for short) he has totally neglected just about everything - including his kids. No, I'm not exagerating that at all. Two weekends now he has NOT gone to get his kids and has had his other son's mother drive over here to pick him up - usually he meets her halfway b/c it's 2+ hour drive each way, and he's already over there to pick up his other kids. I think it's sad - he's totally wrapped up in this thing (I'm sorry I keep calling her that, but that's how I think of her - actually, I'm not sorry - she's a bitch that is ruining good men for the rest of us) and has become wrapped up in solving all of her problems and making his world revolve around hers. Again, guys, if that's what you want, then I'm going to be owning a lot of dogs for the rest of my life - I just won't play that game.