Friday, September 30, 2005

The fence

I once saw a picture that someone sent me online that was too cool. It was a yellow, diamond shaped warning sign that had a picture (in black on yellow) of a german shephard in the center (like the outline but filled in so you could tell what kind of dog it was). The sign was posted on a tree with an open fence behind it and you could see the dog in the background. The top of the sign said "I can make it to the fence in 2.8 seconds" - the bottom (under the dog) said "Can you?".

I want this sign. Except, I, of course, want the picture of my lab on it instead of the german. Especially on nights like tonight, when I take my dog outside to go potty (and the yard is now fenced - for the dog I might add....why can't I deduct him on my taxes again??) and I see and hear the police helicopter flying almost directly over my neighborhood with the search light on. This is the time when I NEED THAT SIGN ON MY FENCE. Yes, I have a big, loveable black lab - but most idiots who are miscreants (wow, I got to use idiot and miscreant in the same sentence - pretty cool, huh?) do not know the difference between a black lab, a rottweiler, or a doberman pincer. Just having a picture of any dog (hell, a miniature poodle) on a sign would probably deter most people. So, if someone out there knows of a specialized sign company or pet supply place online that makes something like that OR can create something like that, please let me know. I want that sign for my fence :)

Friday, September 23, 2005

Addendum to previous post

This is what I mean when I can be a real Bitch:

I had a roommate in college - T - that would FRY BOLOGNA and leave the pan on the stove. We finally sat down and talked to him about this and simply said, please turn around (a whole 3 feet) and place the pan in the sink with water and soap. We were not even asking him to wash it or put it in the dishwasher - just put water and soap in it to kill the smell. TWO DAYS LATER: I come home from class - pan with congealed grease on stove - whole apartment was rank. So, what did I do? I became a bitch - I put the pan in his bedroom IN HIS BED. And, I kid you not, he slept with it for 3 days before he realized it was even there. We never had a problem after that.

I get to a certain point where I think that I have been more than fair about something and I'm sorry, I shouldn't have to ask an adult man to clean up his dishes every day - I'm not his mom and I have better things to do with my time than remind him to clean up his own dishes - which is what he asked me to do this AM - and I said no. After the point where I feel I have been more than fair and patient, I'm going to let you know that I've been pushed over the edge - and it's not going to be a pretty sight. Unfortunately, I am part Irish and I have the temper to go with it. I do a pretty good job of controlling it, but I'm reaching the boiling point soon.

Dependability Part II

Yep, I'm done. Previous post on dependability for those of you that are bored and have nothing else to do. Me - home (by choice) on a Friday night so I could get some work done. This week has been rough.

So, I left a pretty nasty note for C last night - about the dishes. Wow, what a shock. I should back up and explain why was not necessarily in the correct frame of mind to deal with a sinkful of dishes when I got home at 9:30 last night:
  • I got about 6 hours of sleep and got up at 5:30 on Thursday morning to study for a test that I had on Thursday morning.
  • I have no idea how much caffeine I poured into my body on Thursday - an IV would have worked well - I think I passed the legal limit - I had class last night that I needed to stay awake for.
  • My class ran over time by about 40 minutes. One of my group members, rather than paying attention to what was going on and taking notes (knowing that we have to totally redo an assignment) screwed around for about an hour of class on the web.
  • We got to class and discovered we (meaning almost the entire class) were missing part of the assignment that was due the day before and the prof doesn't allow late submissions on work. Once he found out that we had been unclear on directions, he said it had to be posted asap to receive credit.
  • Right before class, I find out that my brother, sister-in-law and their 3 kids may have to evacuate from the storm. My dad calls me back and says they are not (base commander won't let him leave) - my dad then tells me that my sister-in-law is pregnant again, and that my brother is probably going to need surgery on his knee again since he may have either torn the meniscus or the ACL a couple of days ago - so he is hobbling around with a brace right now.
  • I've been parking in my garage for over 2 years with no piece of wood to tell me where to stop and I have yet to hit anything. I moved the fucking piece of wood out of the way yesterday (C apparently thinks I'm an idiot and I don't know how to park in my own garage) and he put it back last night. He didn't put it up far enough, so the garage door hit my car coming down. I was a little tired to notice I wasn't pulled up far enough and I was still IN my freaking car when it happened.
  • Then, I come in with the following mindset: I am totally lost on something very important in the class that I had on Thursday evening. I'm frustrated and upset and confused - I called my dad and had a complete and total breakdown on the phone (crying uncontrollably - which I hate more than anything in the world) and I'm seriously beginning to question why I am in this program - which I then email my prof about as well.
  • C invites his latest fling to the house - without any apparent consideration for anything that I need to do.
  • He passes the sink at least 4 times BEFORE she arrives and doesn't do a damn thing with any of the dishes in the sink.

Now, had I not had the day (or for that matter, the week) that I had, I probably wouldn't have written the note. However, I really didn't want to start my Friday off by having a sink full of dirty dishes. I can be a real bitch sometimes. I have a feeling that at some point, dishes are going to end up in C's bedroom - I just feel it coming. Bottom line - he's not listening or even taking anything I ask into consideration. It's really pissing me off. I think he will be leaving in December.

This AM was pretty bad. He asked me about the note and he left one for me telling me that I didn't have to be so "stinky" and I told him that yes, I did. I'm sick of this. I've asked him for 2 full weeks to call a storage company to get his shit out of the garage. "I forgot" or "I didn't have time". It took me TEN MINUTES to find a storage company. TEN. MINUTES. It's takes less than 5 minutes to put dishes in the dishwasher. FIVE. MINUTES. I'm over it - which is exactly what I told him this morning. I've over it. I think tonight I'll tell him that December is it. I really don't think this is working out at all.

Why is this not working? First, I'm tired of being shit on - this goes back to being dependable. And here's what really pisses me off: I agreed some months ago that I would watch his son for 3 days each month from Sept thru Dec. This is a major inconvenience for me. I have classes. I've already had to take him to a class with me for 3 hours - I'd like to see ANYONE try to keep a 9 year old boy occupied and quiet for 3 solid hours on a weekday evening. Fortunately he was able to play in the computer lab, but I still had to go check on him periodically. So, I can do this for him, but simple little things that I ask him to do just get shoved to the wayside. Well, that pretty much stops right now. I'm tired of being taken for granted and taken advantage of. I hate to sound like a bitch, but let's face it - I AM a bitch. I'm just a bitch in hiding so to speak. I'm over this. So, next time he calls me at the last minute (like he did two weeks ago) to ask me if I can pick up his son for after-school care, the answer will be "No". Can I watch him for a couple of hours? "No". Any other requests - NO. I'm tired of it. As it is, I am barely holding it together for myself. Things just have a way of cropping up at the last minute and they have to be dealt with. There's too much to do and not enough time to do it in. I really need to work 24/7 this weekend to get caught up on homework. I have no idea when I will be able to finish working on everything that I need to finish.

On the flip side - I applied for a different position with my job today. I know that I won't get it - but I wanted to throw my hat in the ring so at least they know that I am interested in moving up beyond teaching and into the curriculum area with the school. We'll see what happens. I would at least like to get an interview if nothing else. Again, I probably won't get it - there are, I'm sure, too many others out there that have more experience than I do that will be applying. Although, this is sometimes part of my problem.... I do not have enough confidence in myself to go after things sometimes - especially if it puts me "out there" or sets me up for failure somehow. This is something that I know that I need to work on - but one step at a time - I need to kick C out in Dec first, then finish school, then think about moving or talking to my school about moving to GA. So, that's it for the night - I think I'm going out for ice cream :)

Sunday, September 11, 2005

What goes around....

...comes around....

Remember that saying - oh and the other one "You get back what you put out" - yep, firm believer in that.

Remember that assholes that live across the street from me and have absolutely no respect for anyone or anything except themselves?

So, earlier this week I see the Pimp-mobile up on blocks and the tires are gone. I don't really think anything of it - they are always working on cars (as evidenced by the oil that stains their driveway and the street in front of their house - and incidentally, mine...). Well, today C is outside working on his car and I'm pulling weeds. He asks the guy what happened to his tires (he no longer has the pimp rims on it - just the normal ones). The guy says "They got jacked"

I'm having a hard time feeling bad for him - I know I should - it sucks when you are robbed, but then again, I think about how he treats others with no respect at all - and then I think of how disrespectful it is when someone steals your stuff - and then I think - what goes around comes around.

BTW - my dad bust a gut laughing when he found out (he knows what I've been dealing with for the past year) - and basically said "it serves them right for being so disrespectful and rude to all their neighbors - not just you" b/c they are. Their friends show up late at night, music blaring or they do it on purpose (again, see previous post about the assholes saying they are being assholes on purpose). Thoughts?

Friday, September 09, 2005

Weekly wrap-up for thoughts....

So, this was an interesting week that went by in a flash. I'm not even sure I remember the entire week, which may not be a bad thing.

C and I talked AGAIN about things and I basically gave him a list of non-compromisable items. It seemed to be working this week. Since he's been gone since Wednesday out of town, I can't say it's been 100% effective yet - we'll see.

So, on top of him being out of town, it meant that I had to watch his son for him this week while he was gone. I agreed to do this back in July when he found out about this training thing he has to do for work, and before we discussed him moving in, so I'm okay with it. L tried typical kid stuff - like trying to go to bed in his jeans instead of his pj's, and having to be told to brush his teeth and wash his hands - stuff like that, and that's pretty normal for a nine-year-old.

So, C calls me yesterday to tell me that his mother's brother (who was 28) died very suddenly of a heart attack on Wednesday. She is still coming to get him, but don't say anything to his son - understandable and that's definitely NOT something that I want to deal with - been there, done that, have the T-shirt and it sucked.

Can you say "uncomfortable moment" tonight when she got here to pick him up? First, I could tell she's very upset - duh! of course she will be. Then, C didn't know when the funeral would be, so I didn't know what kind of clothes L (his son) would need to get together. I just told him a nice pair of jeans and at least one non-play shirt. So, his mom gets here and makes a big fuss about him getting a nice pair of pants and a nice shirt packed - which he has no idea where his clothes are since he didn't put them in the closet. I see that she is about to lose it, so I send him to get his socks and shoes on while I hunt down clothes. She gets him outside, and again almost breaks down in front of me. I should also stress - this is the very first time I've ever met this woman. I'm sure that she must think C and I are dating again, and we ARE NOT under any circumstances doing that at all. So, this was one of those unpredictable, uncomfortable moments in life that you wish had never happened. What do you say to a total stranger, whose son you are watching, who has lost a brother, has not told her son and is getting ready to lose it in your foyer? Well, there wasn't much I could say except that I understand what she is going through and to please call if she needs to.

So, that was my Friday night - pretty exciting, eh? The rest of my week was fairly routine. Grad school, work, more work, more grad school, oh - insurance paperwork to fax in since I missed the deadline and had to get it in asap or be without insurance for 2 months instead of one, cleaning, laundry, more grad school, even more work .....sigh..... conversation with dad about cheap housing in GA (again!), and this damn tropical storm raining everyday so I can't get anything done in my yard. Ugh. I'm beat. Doesn't sound like I did too much this week, but, I did. Oh - paid bills too. I love my bank - it offers free online bill pay - you ONLY pay a fee if you DON'T use it within a 90 day period - how awesome is that?? Secure and easy and FREE unlike others that charge - I do the credit union thing :) I will miss that when I leave. But, I may try to keep it since everything is direct deposit or online and I hardly ever use the ATM any more since I have the visa check card now - world's best invention in my opinion. Oh, I finally went to the chiropractor today - WOW do I feel better :) Next appointment in 2 weeks and I'm going to try and squeeze a massage in my schedule (no pun intended) between now and then as well to loosen up the muscles more so he can really get in there to adjust - he really couldn't do as much as he wanted to today b/c everything was too tight.

Jedi is pissy b/c we haven't walked in several days - well, it's raining - I have to continually remind him that he doesn't like to walk in the rain, and neither do I really. So, we will see what the weather is like in the early AM. My reminders have no effect on him whatsoever since he understands not a word of what I am saying most times - much like children ;)

So, I have the house to myself until tomorrow at around 5 PM - kind of nice in a way, and this will happen at least once a month until December. So, with my very boring week in black and white, or really in white on green for my blog, I bid a good night and good weekend to everyone.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Roommate issues

Okay, I'm hereby officially advising anyone who has ever considered taking a roommate into their house (not an apartment - that's a little different) to NOT do it under any circumstances.

Long story short - b/c I am tired and not typing too well right now - I've asked my friend C who has moved into my guest room to do a few, simple courteous things that you would do if you were in someone's house. Examples:
Clean up your own dishes - and your kids' dishes - do not rely on kids to do it - check it.
Put things back as you found them.
Lock doors when you leave the house.

My one friend thinks I am being entirely unreasonable and that I need to compromise.

Well, in my opinion, I have already made HUGE compromises for C and the kids. I gave up part of my office and rearranged furniture in my home to fit his stuff - including a bed in my office for the kids - which I was really not too keen on doing.

So, Saturday AM I have a complete breakdown in front of him and we have a huge fight. I've already had 2 breakdowns with various friends earlier in the week. The main issue: dishes - cannot be left scattered around the house (NOT joking here) or in the sink - put them in the f***ing dishwasher.

Sat. night I come home from school from doing some work - the kitchen is a disaster and all of them are sitting around in the living room watching a movie. Hmmm... I want to make dinner
for myself and can't b/c there is no room for me to work. I have to ASK someone to come clean up the kitchen - I don't think I should have to do that.

We talked AGAIN this morning about it. Guess what's in the sink RIGHT NOW and he is home. He has washed his hands in the kitchen sink and rinsed out his own glass to get water. The dishes are still sitting there. If they are still there tomorrow morning - I'm going to ask him to leave by the end of the month.

How many of you out there think I am being unreasonable? I will state this: This is MY HOME and right now, I do not even feel comfortable in it. On Sat. morning (it was really bad - place reeked like dog urine - which it wasn't - he left a pan out overnight where he beer-boiled hotdogs and it fermented to ammonia) when I left to go to school to work - I didn't even want to come home. All I could think about was Georgia. If I weren't in school where I HAD to attend two of my classes b/c they take roll (all the others are online) I probably would have called my friend who is a realtor and left.

It goes back to my dependability post (sorry - not linking it - too tired - look to your right) - I also told him this AM - I feel like my wishes about how to keep up the house are being totally disrespected and disregarded, and that I am being taken advantage of right now.

I'll see how tomorrow AM works out. Right now, I'm pretty pissed to the point that I am typing this while he is in the room and not even talking to him. He probably thinks it's b/c it's late, I'm tired and working on the computer. Who knows?? Thoughts anyone???

Friday, September 02, 2005

What was I thinking?????

Okay, what on earth was I thinking about when I decided to go back to school? Grad school may kill me - which is why I haven't posted in a while - the last one doesn't count b/c it was a copy/paste from an email.

I am overloaded. Today sucked. Last night sucked. I hate my Thursday night professor - he treated us like we were a bunch of morons. I'm sorry - I didn't pay $500 to be talked down to when I am an intelligent adult. If I weren't, I wouldn't be sitting in front of you asshole!!!!!!!

I also ended up staying up until midnight last night working - even worse - still didn't finish. I could not get anything done yesterday for work in a consistent manner. Every time I tried to do something - some interuption would occur. I now have three freaking phones and a pager - ugh. Then, I tried to sleep in this AM - oh, yeah, my dog is my alarm clock - no sleeping in for me! Up at 6:15 - finally rolled him off me (he likes to flop on top of me in the morning in hopes of getting a tummy rub - which he did for about 30 minutes then I booted his 85 pound butt off the bed and off me!) at around 7ish. Got dressed - went for a walk with him - he's been neglected for the past two days - no time for walks or play. Got back - logged in and did email and finished grading. Took a shower - went right back to bed for an hour and a half. If one of my stupid phones hadn't rung, I probably would have slept all day (apparently, I turned the alarm off and went back to sleep and didn't realize it). Motivation to get stuff done has been lacking today. I went and got gas so I could go to my professor's house for the social meeting thing he does once a month so I can network. He lives in BFE. But, it's a nice part of town - it's just BFE. I am finally getting laundry dealt with and hung up. And I've made my way through 5 or 6 boxes of stuff from school that I either threw out, kept (although where I'm going to put it, have NO freaking clue), or put into boxes for this new teacher to pick up from me tonight. ....sigh.... Only six more boxes to go - ugh.

And to top everything else off - I'm going to have to buy about $200 worth of software for my computer this semester - AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!